More on Dress Codes

I was reading The Philippine Star the other day and read the article "Dress Me Up, Dress Me Down" by Exie Abola, a blogger and teacher at the Ateneo de Manila University. Filed under the Star "Fashion" tab(?), he wrote about "[t]he climatic disturbance that threatens to turn into a storm...a proposed change in the dress code."

I wrote previously on a similar move from the authorities at Silliman University, where two of my daughters go. I also write this from a different perspective: My father, uncle, brothers and cousins went to the Ateneo. Some of my young nephews still do. There were stories of the old Padre Faura campus. I remember that in the 70's it was a big deal to colegialas that the High School boys wore casual clothes. I vaguely remember some sort of dress code at the time but it wasn't that much of a big deal. Ateneans being as they are, they were wont to outdress each other. My brothers still dress appropriately although I can't say for sure if it's due to their Jesuit education.

So it's hard for me to imagine Ateneans come to this state of "underdress." I would likely picture them to be more dressed "up". One point raised by the author was something that didn't arise in the Silliman discussion. Is it unique to the ADMU?

Source

Stories abound of students who go out of the campus and meet others, perhaps to conduct an interview or other school business, wearing shorts and flipflops. It has happened in my own department. One of our literature majors who graduated just this past March applied for a teaching position with us this April and arrived for his job interview in — you guessed it — shorts and flipflops. Our chairperson, needless to say, was not amused and reminded the candidate that he wasn’t at the beach. (He didn’t get the job.)

The matter of dressing for church was also mentioned.

...we discussed the idea of a dress code for churches, a matter in the news a few months ago when bishops were reported to be miffed by the too-casual wear especially of the youth. During that session the class agreed on another statement: that the church is a special place deserving special treatment. Most of the students thought these two assertions were true, yet they had a hard time conceding that church officials were right in wanting tougher rules on what the congregation should wear.

People in Dumaguete mostly dress for church. I bet they still wear their new clothes to Sunday Mass to have them "blessed" before wearing them elsewhere. As a reminder however, or in obedience to Church hierarchy, there are posters at the bulletin boards.

The author raises his view as an educator while I write as an individualist and parent. Though there is concern on the youth's lack of propriety, I'd like to assume that we are both wary of the consequences of the implementation of dress codes in school campuses.

[Rules] are fashioned in the context of a relationship between the ruler and the ruled, boss and subordinate, parent and child, teacher and student. How the rules are accepted depends greatly on what kind of relationship exists between the two unequal parties. If the subordinate views authority with suspicion or even downright hostility, he will probably meet any move to control his behavior with resentment. I can imagine students packing flipflops and skimpy shorts and tops into their knapsacks to bring them out when they leave the campus and hang out in the coffee shops along Katipunan, brandishing their defiance on their bodies on the other side of the concrete highway.

And in the end, what will have been achieved? Will the new rules make people more respectful of others, more aware of decorum, more appreciative of the rules of propriety? Or will they only foment ill will? Isn’t it true that if the [relationship] is chilly, then being told how to dress up will only feel like being dressed down?

(Blogger's Note: Mr. Abola has graciously given his permission to quote from his work. You can read his blog and the article in full here.)

A Korean On "Ungroup The Koreans"

Strangely, this week's online edition of The Weekly Sillimanian did not post a letter from Jeong Jin Tae. This student was delegated by the president of the Korean Fellowship of Students to react against the article (italics mine). As it was a letter and not a regular feature, it wasn't among the online articles. It would have been nice though for the staff to include it though. First. it would have shown their online readers some integrity and more importantly, I would just have to [Ctrl]+C then [Ctrl]+V.

Reactions to the "Ungroup The Koreans" article were mildly reminiscent of the Malu Fernandez brouhaha. Urban legend has it that the writer has not returned to class since the article came out and that threats were imminent.

Here are excerpts from the letter.

Personally, I felt so sad and angry at the same time. I understand that it was written to challenge the Korean students in Silliman, but there were a lot of negative and hurtful comments which were inappropriate. Allow me to enumerate some of them:

Most of them are white, chinky, and all of them come from South Korea. If you guessed who I'm talking about then you're a genius. South Koreans are all over the place!

...[Korean students] feel that our appearance was ridiculed and discriminated. But mind you, even the Chinese and Japanese have a similar appearance.

...Dumaguete City is starting to look like a Korean Colony.

...it sounds very derogatory and makes [us] seem like we are a threat to Dumaguete. He could have been more sensitive and used a fairer term to describe us.

I prefer to call them just plain Koreans like most of us do because those North Korean communists don't even exist outside their own country, and to my observation, their country is like a gigantic, high-security prison. I would seriously freak out if I see a North Korean walking down the streets of Dumaguete City.

When you accuse a nation, don't ever be ignorant of what is actually going on. You should be careful because you come from a different culture... [North and South Korea] are one even though we are separated by... political ideologies... It's just like how [Filipinos] feel when somebody talks bad about Mindanao or Luzon.

Obviously, Koreans come to the Philippines to study English.

Not all Koreans come here to study English because a lot of us come here to experience a new culture to broaden our minds.

There are Korean students who have been here in Silliman for more than two years, and still their English is the same as before.

I am sure that some of us Koreans speak better English than some Filipinos.

...I haven't seen a decent Korean student get better in English, despite all the education that person is getting. And so we ask, "What gives?" There is nothing wrong with the English education that Silliman provides them.

Have you seen all the Koreans here in Silliman? Honestly, [English Orientation here] is not good enough compared to the other English institutions...

This is the reason why Koreans prefer to group together rather than playing around with their new Filipino friends. Its not that they make it hard for us to understand them, we make it hard for them to understand us. And because of this, they lose confidence in communicating with us and stick to the group where communication is not an inconvenience. We should not forget that we Filipinos have English as our second language. We know it better than Koreans do. So in general, it is us who should accommodate them.

...don't Filipinos also prefer to group together rather than mingle with Koreans? ...English is not exclusively a second language for Filipinos, but also for other people all over the world.

Silliman being branded as a Korean refugee camp isn't a bad thing after all.

There are many terms to use to describe a second home. This statement makes us mad.

Ungroup the Koreans!

The title should be..."Accomodate the Koreans!" instead. The title chosen by the writer makes it seem like he wants to pick a fight...

I'll restrain giving my opinions and urge to edit nalang. It will be my contribution to the issue.

On "Ungroup The Koreans"

Last week's Weekly Sillimanian featured an article on their "Kipin' It Real" section entitled "Ungroup The Koreans." Written by Suthai G. Katima, it has created a lot of flak from, you guessed it: Koreans. I'm reprinting the article in full from the online edition of the Sillimanian.

Most of them are white, chinky, and all of them come from South Korea. If you guessed who I'm talking about then you're a genius. South Koreans are all over the place! Just when I thought we had enough of them a few years ago, now Dumaguete City is starting to look like a Korean Colony.

I prefer to call them just plain Koreans like most of us do because those North Korean communists don't even exist outside their own country, and to my observation, their country is like a gigantic, high-security prison. I would seriously freak out if I see a North Korean walking down the streets of Dumaguete City. How often does that happen?

Obviously, Koreans come to the Philippines to study English. This country is the sole provider of competitive English Education in South East Asia. Not to forget, it's very affordable, and Silliman is one of the well known universities when it comes to English. Sounds cool doesn't it? But do you see a significant improvement in the Korean's ability to speak English? Personally, I haven't. There are Korean students who have been here in Silliman for more than two years, and still their English is the same as before.

It's pretty obvious, but people hardly notice. Koreans have a hard time communicating and holding a conversation with their surroundings and I haven't seen a decent Korean student get better in English, despite all the education that person is getting. And so we ask, "What gives?" There is nothing wrong with the English education that Silliman provides them. It's the Sillimanians that are holding them back. That's right, "us".

This is the reason why Koreans prefer to group together rather than playing around with their new Filipino friends. Its not that they make it hard for us to understand them, we make it hard for them to understand us. And because of this, they lose confidence in communicating with us and stick to the group where communication is not an inconvenience. We should not forget that we Filipinos have English as our second language. We know it better than Koreans do. So in general, it is us who should accommodate them.

One of the main reasons why Koreans don't improve their English is they never put it into real life practice. If Koreans continue to stick together and speak Korean, when will their English get better? But it's because we don't accommodate them in our society that they group together in the first place! So I think you're getting the idea on what solutions can be applied. Well, one solution would be to (Drum roll please) UNGROUP THE KOREANS!

By ungrouping and getting them to mingle with us more, they are obliged to use whatever English they know. By being more accommodating, and making them feel comfortable with us, their Korean-group-together will be out of their daily routine. It's like breaking up NSYNC and making them all go solo. It's easy. Do you have a Korean friend? Well then, quit ignoring that person and start talking to him/her. Invite that Korean for lunch with your Filipino friends, and any other activity you have. Don't forget, we're the host, and they're the guests. And in Filipino culture, that means so much more than simply smiling and saying hi.

Fellow students tend not to bother with them because it's a hassle in creating mutual understanding. But how would you feel if you were treated the same way in their country? And mind you, there aren't a lot of Filipinos in South Korea. Learning English in Silliman is just half of the process. Putting it to use is the other half. And yes, WE are the other half. By welcoming them to our society and by encouraging them to play with us more, they will become more confident and definitely improve their English.

Actually, we tend to be intimidated by the Koreans when in fact they are more intimidated by us. We know English, and they don't. So why don't we all share the wealth, and be one big happy family? Having a Korean as a friend can be very rewarding. The sharing of culture and traditions is a wonderful experience. Silliman being branded as a Korean refugee camp isn't a bad thing after all. At least they help improve our economy, and by giving them a pleasant experience, we might just put the Philippines back into the map again. So let’s get on the challenge: Ungroup the Koreans!

A Korean student's reaction in this week's edition will follow.

On Being Behind The Wheel

Source

I just came home from driving on and off for six hours, and it's only midday! This fact dawned on me when I felt the pain shoot up my back as I stretched. Although my day started at about 6am, it wasn't after 2 coffees that I had to leave. This was how it went:

• 7:15 Bring Tara and Gia to Silliman in time for their 7am class. (Impossible, right?)
  
• -7:45 Dash into the convenience store for juice and newspapers, national & local.
  
• -8:15 Get deposit slip from guard at bank. I ask him if I can be customer #1 and get the stub already. No go! They only give out stubs/numbers at 9am when they open.
  
• 8:30 Pick Gia up, go to the supermarket...
• -8:45 ...which opens at 9am! Read the paper to pass time.
  
• -9:00 Get a week's worth of groceries done in 30 minutes and bring it back home.
  
• -9:45 Drop off groceries, pick up Gab for preschool which starts at 10.
• 10:05 Drop Gab off. Gia's already late for her 10am class!
• 10:30 Find a place to park and make a deposit to Manila account. The electricity has to be paid.
  
• 10:50 Buy lunch!! Too busy driving to actually get any cooking done. Grab half a soggy tuna sandwich and an ice-cold Coke to keep your energy level up.
• 11:15 Gab's class is almost over! Circle the block 3 times and settle for a spot far away from preschool.
• 11:25 Run back to the car because I see I'm getting a ticket for: Illegal parking of all things, the first ticket of my life!!
• 11:40 Late picking Gab up. He's the only one left:( I'm closer to tears than he is.
  
• 11:50 Go to Hibbard Hall to pick Tara up when she's actually at the Science building across the field. And as if it wasn't enough, there's a sudden downpour!
  
• 12:10 Go home to realize I've left Zaki in school. Tara sat on my phone on the way back so I didn't see the message. Rush back to Silliman.
• 12:25 Apologize profusely to Zaki, decide to wait for Gia. Her class ends at 12.30
• 12:45 Take Zaki and Gia home, Tara's class is at 1. Take her to class immediately.
• 1:20 Finally get home to get a few words in.

And did I mention that all my kids are of college age!? Oh yeah, and it's THAT time of the month. Anybody would've guessed! Duty resumes at 3:00.

On School Uniforms & Dress Codes (Part I)

My middle daughter goes to an all-girl Catholic college, a true-blue colegiala, so I won't mention her school nalang. I want to believe that she's in her comfort zone, but I'm fooling myself. I knew right off (she told me herself) that she just preferred going to somewhere that required a uniform. She was always serious about school, so having to don the same outfit everyday gave her time for the more important stuff. And when your head is fuzzy in the mornings, like hers is, it's clearly a no-brainer.

Source: www.philbiotech.com

My son goes to DLSU. Typically, I never noticed &/or he never brought up the fact that he's been wearing the same set of clothes I got him in his freshman year (he's a senior). Though he claims he doesn't care, he still looks put together. Everyone else in the campus dresses very well. As DLSU remains a Catholic learning institution with tuition a premium, it's no surprise. Last year though, there was a move to impose a dress code. Most vehemently opposed were the proposed bans on certain types of footwear. The males would have been disallowed to wear their sandals and the female coeds, their precious Havaianas. The horror!! The student body won that round.

Source: en.wikipedia.org

My other two daughters go to Silliman University where the vibe is more bohemian. (Think UP in the late 70's before the rich kids started enrolling there). There's a diverse demographic represented in the campus. Only a small percentage of the population is actually based in Dumaguete. Students come from all over the country and recently, from different parts of the world. With increased cultural exposure, the youth became more sophisticated. Knowing what's current is easy with the advent of real-time information transmission. Telecommunications giant Globe Telecoms has recognized this upcoming force and came up with the MySilliman SIM. Further, it has made wireless connectivity available in the campus.

Silliman is hip, in a laid-back sort of way. (Am I making sense?)

At the heels of Foundation Week festivities however, yesterday's issue of The Weekly Sillimanian reported somber news:

"The proposed dress code policy states that men should not wear sleeveless shirts; tank tops; flimsy or see-through pants, shorts, or shirts; "porontong;" and short shorts.

On the other hand, women should not wear micro-mini skirts; mini skirts; backless, strapless, or off-shoulder attire; see-through blouses and skirts; skirts with slits reaching the upper thighs; hanging, tube or spaghetti [sic!] blouses and dresses; plunging necklines; leggings; short shorts; PE shorts; and bra-less outfits.

Moreover, both men and women are prohibited from wearing rubber, bedroom or bathroom slippers; tattered or torn pants; and items of clothing that show foul language and/or graphics."

If approved, the proposed dress code will take effect next school year.

Who draws the line and defines decency and modesty? The same piece of clothing may look cute on one girl and obscene on another. Is it then all a matter of bra size? The only answer to this issue is ban these clothing altogether, with no partiality to age, creed, race, or dress size. This is what SU plans to do.

If parents do not censor their children's clothes, can the school take over? Given, most these students stay in dormitories away from home. They observe an extraordinary amount of independence and responsibility until graduation. Should we not grant them at least the freedom to choose what they wear?

End of Part One.

On School Uniforms & Dress Codes (Part II)

I pity Silliman University authorities for even trying to define "appropriate dress." It's so subjective that it's bound to generate arguments on all sides. I won't spare anyone my take on this matter. I will, however, make it a lot more interesting.

Sleeveless shirts for both men and women are not only worn for their fashion merit. There's a whole sensibility to this. It keeps the wearer cool in the Dumaguete weather and the blackouts:) The best part of these articles of clothing is that they spare the public at large from those disgusting things called sweat marks.


Unless I go to a private affair, I don't wear tube or off-shoulder blouses. I wouldn't exactly define them as inappropriate, but I got that email with the video of a girl whose tube top was pulled down as a prank by a stranger. It totally freaked me out!

Source: www.olivergoodstuff.com

Source: community.livejournal.com/sfas

Source: houseofholland.co.uk

And who's to tell us what's foul or not? Even being politically correct is a matter of taste. The shirt above cost 35 pounds and anyone "fasyon" recognizes it. If it's "in," is it right? And how about politically incorrect t-shirts, what does it mean anyway? Is a "Gloria Resign!" slogan foul? Any number of minorities may find any number of logos offensive. Take your pick.

What's with plunging necklines? I made a comment regarding bra size in my last post. I wasn't exaggerating. They matter. Plunging necklines only seem obscene when it's filled it out, and even that's a matter of debate. With anyone with cup size smaller than "B," you would only expose your clavicle.

Source: www.people.com

An identical dress, a fairly decent one by any standard, can look different on two women. We may write down all the rules and the kids may try to follow it to the letter with malice to no one. Sometimes, though, we should just admit that we don't have it all covered.

This pair of pants retails at $79.00 at Abercrombie & Fitch. These are "The" tattered/torn jeans!

What if you can't get these jeans and can afford only ukay? I once had a pair of those and literally wore them till they fell apart. And it was the time when torn jeans weren't even uso.

Source: www.abercrombie.com

Athletes in shorts always look HOT, they distract you in the worst possible way. Is that why they want to ban athletic wear in the campus? So for as long as the Varsity teams compete to the best of their ability, let them wear what they want! I'm kind of divided on the PE uniform thing though, especially when they've been recently used. If it's a matter of hygiene, I'd probably consider. But as to the comfort and time element, I'd rather run to my next class in this gear than in a pretty dress.
Source: www2.hkedcity.net

On the subject of "short" shorts for men however, I agree that they should be banned. Just because they're fugly, nothing else. Wearing those infamous "nutcracker" shorts are over. Plus, this might cause blood to rush to you head. Not nice!
Source: www.stevetaft.com

Leggings are cute. I was there when they came out the last time, I think the 80's. I hope they're not on the way out. It's entirely different how they are worn by kids today. It's actually a form of modesty to wear leggings or skinny jeans under a short dress.

Source: www.areyouabeauty.com

Fashion is dynamic so it keeps changing. And even as the dress code is being discussed, tube tops might not be "it thing" anymore. As for trends yet to come, do we keep adding them to the list?

I am not for the imposition of a dress code. As a conservative mother, it's important for ME that my children wear clean clothing and attire appropriate to the event and venue. They were taught to give due respect to those who admit them into their territory, so to speak.

To impress my standards on others however, is not right. Part of the respect is accepting what OTHER PEOPLE deem appropriate.

Silliman is known as a progressive and liberal Christian university. Will it risk losing this reputation with the imposition of a dress code? I suggest their students be "gently" reminded that their demeanor reflects not only their education, but more importantly, their person. They should be "encouraged" to dress as befits their distinction of belonging to this elite institution. They should be acknowledged as adults and told so. The most severe of these actions should be a "request" for self-monitoring.

The biggest complement Silliman University can pay itself is to forget about this. It is for them to believe that their students have inculcated their vision and been taught well. As a late, great Law School Dean told me a long time ago: "We cannot teach our children independence and critical thinking if we do not willingly give them the opportunity to practice these."

On School Uniforms & Dress Codes (Part III)

I can't believe I left out the part about footwear! It may be because it wasn't brought up in the Weekly Sillimanian. Though I remember shortly before Foundation Week, there was something like "Come To School in Slippers Day" as a form of protest. This necessitates a Part 3 to the already long series. I'll be quick.

As I mentioned two posts ago, the students at De La Salle University in Taft Avenue vigorously defended their right to wear their favorite footwear.

Everyone knows that the now fashionable flip-flops originated in Asia. In the vernacular, they're the ever reliable tsinelas. Who knew they would be all the rage?

Source: havaianas.americanas.com.br

Source: www.eastlandshoe.com

Source: www.islander.ph

I'm all for comfort. When you have a campus as large as Silliman's, it's a blessing to have comfortable shoes. The terrain varies from place to place from dirt, concrete, asphalt, grass, marble and tile. The lowly slipper can walk with ease wherever it goes come rain or shine.

Besides, if you consider all the conveyances students ride to get to school, you're better off in slippers. Students take the pedicab (read:tricycle), the back of an easy-ride (those locally assembled miniature pick-up trucks), bicycles and scooters. We're not even talking about walking here.

I admit there are many alternatives for women: flats, loafers or sneakers. Oh yeah, and the infamous Crocs. Let's leave it to them to decide. In the same way they decide to put themselves in serious danger with heels higher than 2."
Source: www.salvios.com.au

Men on the other hand, classify their footwear into just two categories: open/closed, leather/non-leather, black/non-black, depending on who you're talking with. With one whole option unavailable to them, imagine the air of discontent in the campus.

NOTE: I have been unable to think of anything else to say that I haven't said before. So I'll just spare all of us the discomfort and end it!